Rough around the Edges

I was a shy kid who lived through a turbulent home life. Once I left to live on my own, I felt a sense of peace I never experienced before. That quiet calming environment, which I now had total control over, was addictive. It was so addictive that my shyness evolved into something new. At that point in my life, I was still shy, but it wasn't as bad as it was when I was a kid. But now I was totally content with being alone. I stayed that way for many years, and I still am to a certain degree, but it did introduce another level of complications into my life.

At some point, I realized that my now naturally introverted nature, while comforting for me, was also keeping me away from experiences in life that require a more outgoing personality. Over the years I've tried to be less introverted, but I somehow always found my way back to solitude. From time to time, however, I have managed to make some major progress. For example, I've run public-facing businesses and I've even gotten married, but I still revert back to that inward calmness I seek for comfort. It's hard to break that habit. Some might argue that I shouldn't have to break the habit and just accept who I am. I tend to agree but doing so would mean also accepting the challenges my solitude presents.

You see, our society is not built for people like me. The greatest opportunities come to those who are outgoing and social, not reserved and isolated. And if there's anything else about you that may fall into the "not so desirable" category, well that just makes things that much more difficult for you. Myself for example, not only am I introverted by nature, but I also have other health issues that make life a bit challenging for me. I haven't spoken about these issues publicly (yet) so not many people know about them, but their effects do cause friction in my life as people don't know that there are underlying causes for some of my less desirable personality traits or behaviors.

Society spends way too much attention on the shiny ones; the ones who present as the ideal human specimens that many people strive to emulate. People like me are rough around the edges. We're not as polished and presentable. What's sad is that even if we don't shine as bright on the outside, we may actually gleam bright with light on the inside, but no one may ever know. Too often we get overlooked while the focus is on society's shining examples.

I want the world to realize that the ones they've been overlooking, the ones that don't seem to fit into the norms of popular culture and mainstream society, we are just as important. Obviously, no matter who you are and how you present yourself outwardly to the world, there will always be good people, and others that are not so good. Everyone has their own motivations in life, good or bad. But if you don't take the time to notice the ones you've been overlooking, you may never discover the good ones hiding in plain sight.

I hope there will come a time when people like me are free to be themselves without missing out on the aspects of life that are often reserved for the more socially acceptable people. In the meantime, I'll do what I can to make that future a reality for us all.